"I knew I'd been living in Berkeley too long when I saw a sign that said 'Free firewood' and my first thought was 'Who was Firewood and what did he do?'"

"I'm a man of the world, Andy. Why, I've even been to Raleigh!"

"Life's not about living it to the fullest, it's about loving to live."

"On his examination paper a boy wrote, 'A natural death is where you die by yourself without a doctor's help."

"If God had wanted us to think just with our wombs, why did He give us a brain?"

"Self-love is not opposed to the love of other people. You cannot really love yourself and do yourself a favor without doing people a favor, and vise versa."

"In Hollywood, an equitable divorce settlement means each party getting fifty percent of publicity."

"Whoever said 'Grandmas are moms with lots of frosting' obviously never licked one."

"Always render more and better service than is expected of you, no matter what your task may be."

"Music and silence combine strongly because music is done with silence, and silence is full of music."

"What's the earth With all its art, verse, music, worth - Compared with love, found, gained, and kept?"

"Happiness is in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort."