"Coincidences are spiritual puns."

"The only reason there isn't life on other planets is because their scientists were more advanced than ours."

"If you laid all of the lawyers in the world, end to end, on the equator ---- It would be a good idea to just leave them there."

"It takes far less courage to kill yourself than it takes to make yourself wake up one more time. It is harder to stay where you are than to get out."

"Like having your own licence to print money."

"True compassion is more than flinging a coin to a beggar; it is not haphazard and superficial. It comes to see that an edifice that produces beggars needs restructuring."

"Let's not escape into mathematics. Let's stay with reality."

"Nature never deceives us; it is we who deceive ourselves."

"You know how it is when you go to be the subject of a psychology experiment, and nobody else shows up, and you think maybe that's part of the experiment? I'm like that all the time."

"Know the true value of time; snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness; no laziness; no procrastination; never put off till tomorrow what you can do today."

"Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them."

"Imagination was given man to compensate for what he is not, and a sense of humor to console him for what he is."