"I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all."

"CandyIs dandyBut liquorIs quicker."

"People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up."

"Progress might have been all right once but it has gone on too long."

"He without benefit of scruples His fun and money soon quadruples."

"Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long."

"I was born at the age of 12 on a Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer lot."

"Death may be the greatest of all human blessings."

"I really can't come to your party Mrs. Parker, I can't bear fools.' That's strange; your mother could."

"Every civilization that has ever existed has ultimately collapsed."

"Imitation is the sincerest form of television."

"Viewed from the summit of reason, all life looks like a malignant disease and the world like a madhouse."